today someone passed me a paper and i said “thank” and they said “did you just say thank” and then i realized dorothy we’re not on the internet anymore
"hello 911 i’d like to report a murder in th-" "haha, wow you’re a little snitch. hold on a sec. HEY DAVE, CHECK OUT THIS FUCKIN SNITCH ON LINE THREE"
when u get ur friend obsessed with something ur obsessed with
fun prank: wake up during open heart surgery and sing don’t go breakin’ my heart to the surgeon